Lessons in life for Dummies

It's amazing how much a day in your life can teach you. Here are a few lessons I learnt in the span of one day:
1) It feels great 2 walk into a gym n have all overweight eyes on u, enviously ogglin at your near perfect bod......Narcissus, you may hv a new fan club.
2) It is a waste of 5000 bucks n a near perfect bod if ur gym isnt unisex.
3) If u try 2 do stomach crunches faster then usual 2 show off, u will hv trouble laughin the next day.
4) Calling ur teacher a giant bubble of pus probably isnt a gud idea if he is standin right next 2 u.
5) Somesh is hottt.
6) There is no use crying over spilt vodka....boohoohooohoo aaaargh!
7) Tryin 2 teach ur fellow classmates Hindi n Marathi can b very rewarding... esp if u get 2 hear Rishi say, "Batatyache Bhaav vadhle".
8) Ayesha n I shud start a talk show. Any1 who has seen us take Rishi's case knows tat v deserve one. Sorry Simi, Karan.
9) You have 2 accept that, sometimes in life u r the pigeon, n sometimes u r the statue.
10) Balaporia looks like the local drag queen. Also she draws her eyebrows on.
10) Alls well that ends well.
11) Did I mention tat somesh is hottt!

er.... That's all folks!!